topbella

♫jiwa.blOGGer♪

30 September 2011

akue still control..

hows my life siuts me??
i never like those kind of boys..
but doesn't mean i hate him..

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

ketenangan jiwa..

:)
how come it goes...saya dapat baca atie awak....
saya dapat baca mengenai awak..
saya raser saya taw sesuatu mgenai awak..
something that you'ii not describe it all..

but i'm still the same..insyaALLAH...
i alwez be myself..but i realize i should not do that...



aku da stay kat umah..
but only 4 two days..

hrmm...how it happens??
ntah ler..

aque terbaca dier pnya bku..
but i don't mind..
saya xkan jeles n sayer xkan penah jeles..

sbb tu sumer bukan milik saya..itu adalah milikNYA...

ringankan hati dan fikiran sayer..
i hope for the ;last gift..last hug!!

i'm back for a new one..i'm back for the true..one..
miss farizaa rezali..
i hope so..

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

29 September 2011

it's mizaA!!

 :(
something iluminated in my mind...
even you;re my lucky star...

what'll happen..
you'll know later..

how much it means!!

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

bedah katak!!

:)
doctor to be...
insyaALLAH...

conok...bedah katak!!



aku mampu melakukannya....!!

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

aku pasrah saja..cik violet

pertemuan..perpisahan..
x der saper bley buat semua itu terhalang kecuali hanya DIA..

walau sehingga mana hati ini menaruh sesuatu..
takder yang berubah..
masih jelas..
masih elas..
rasa sayang n rindu adeq pada akaq!!
tiada yam berubah selama akaq pergi..

i really knoew that you know it..
jika diizinkan..kita pasti bertemu kembali:)

whateva we do..right here..right now..
you change me lots!!
the day you went away...
since ...now..

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

aku sedar sebenarnya...

kisah islamic couple...
Kisahnya mengenai 3 org, Syafiq, Safura dan Muhammad. Syafiq dan Safura sama-sama belajar di SAM Bestari. Beberapa lama kemudian, Syafiq jatuh hati pada keayuan Safura. Matanya mengalahkan Zinnirah. Wajahnya berseri-seri dengan cahaya keimanan. Pergh!! Cantik sangatlah jika nak diceritakan. Tetapi, Syafiq cuba tahan. Dia tidak boleh meluahkan perasaan dia pada Safura sebab... nanti takut kena tangkap dengan ajk pencegah maksiat sekolah.
beberapa tahun berlalu...Akhirnya, apabila Syafiq berada di Tingkatan 5, dia sudah tidak mampu bertahan. Dia mengatur langkah dan akhirnya, Safura tewas pada pujuk rayunya. Walaubagaimanapun, mereka ini sedar yang mereka orang Islam. Islam tidak membenarkan umatnya ber’couple’. Jadi mereka berpakat yang mereka ini hendak membuat satu revolusi dalam couple. "COUPLE ISLAMIC". Asal keluar, pergi tempat terbuka. Tak mainlah tempat gelap-gelap ni. Bukan itu sahaja, Safura kena pakai tudung labuh. Syafiq pula pakai serban dan jubah. Lepas itu mereka keluar bukan membuang masa, keluar bawa Al-Quran. Berhenti di kedai makan, tadarrus lagi. Jalan pula, mana ada pegang-pegang tangan, mereka ikut cara Nabi Musa. Lelaki di depan, perempuan di belakang. Bila balik rumah, missed call pagi-pagi. Suruh qiamullail. Hah! kan Islamic punya couple tu.
Setelah setahun mengamalkan taktik sedemikian, Syafiq ditakdirkan bertemu dengan Muhammad. Ketika itu Syafiq dan Safura sedang bertadarrus di RFC. Muhammad tiba-tiba datang menghampiri mereka kerana tiada tempat duduk. Bila duduk, Muhammad bertanya, "Have you married?". "No.", jawab Safura. "So, why you sit together with this ajnabi alone here", tanya Muhammad. "Kami couple, tapi Islamic way" jawab Syafiq. Muhammad hanya tersenyum mendengar jawapan itu. Muhammad pun memulakan ceritanya.
"Aku ni muallaf. Asal dulu aku kristian. Tinggal kat Singapore. Dulu, aku suka sangat makan khinzir. Kalau sehari tak makan, pengsan aku. Pernah sekali mak aku terlupa beli
khinzir, aku masuk wad malam tu. Tetapi, Alhamdulillah, Allah buka pintu hati aku untuk terima hidayah-Nya. Bila aku masuk Islam, aku dapat tahu, dalam Islam tak boleh makan khinzir. Aduh, pening kepala aku. Macam mana aku nak buat ni??? Seminggu aku masuk hospital lepas masuk Islam. Kalau zaman Rasulullah dulu ada peringkat-peringkat dia. Tapi aku…mana ada. Jadi, time kat hospital tu aku fikir. Akhirnya, aku jumpa satu jalan keluar. Aku nak Islamkan khinzir tu. Aku beli seekor anak khinzir. Dari kecik aku jaga dia. Seekor lalat pun aku tak bagi dekat. Setiap jam aku mandikan dia. Lepas 3 hari, aku bisikkan kat telinga dia dua kalimah syahadah. Lepas tu, tiap-tiap hari aku bagi tazkirah kat khinzir tu. Asal dia berak aku vacuum terus. Camnilah kehidupan aku dan khinzir tu buat 2 tahun. Lepas dua tahun, masa yang ditunggu-tunggu tiba. Masa untuk sembelih khinzir ni. Tengok-tengok khinzir ni takde leher. Tapi, lantaklah. Aku tibai je sebab dah 2 tahun tak makan khinzir ni. Lepas tu, aku pun masak la bakut teh. Tengah-tengah makan, nampak seorang ustaz tengah jalan-jalan. Muka macam lapar je. Aku pun ajak la dia makan. Ustaz!!! jom makan. khinzir Islam nih.”
Bila terdengar kisah itu, Syafiq dan Safura pun sedar. Kalau benda itu haram, ia tetap haram. Yang halal itu jelas dan yang haram itu jelas...
p/s : yg HARAM tetap akan HARAM walau kita cuba apa cara sekalipon untuk mengHALALkannya..peringatan untuk diri ana sendiri terutamanya....wallahualam

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

25 September 2011

hari raya besh siot!!

OLLa...
bgun pagi pagi..gosok gigi...
umie : adeq ..kakaq gie gosok baju tu..nanti lambat plak nak gi skola nanti..
adeq : kaq..gosok baju adeq bley??..pleaz..haha

pergh!!..
pagi raya yang selalu dilanda kekalutan...
tanpa bersarapan..aku terus ke masjid kat beris kubur besar..
asalnya nak pegi masjid ..

then abis jew smayang sunat hai raya aidilfitri..terus jer gie kat umah anak sdara ayah..
AKU DAPAT 100!!..
alhamdulillah ..rezki melimpah ruah..haha...

balek jew umah..terus jew pakai cantek2 ...

kita orang BERGAMBAR!!

 testing punya testing..rayyan nanges terus terusan...
waa....alalala...
 snatch pic lagi...rayyan  nangis lagi kuat..buruk nya muka dier..haha..
comey nya rayyan ucue...huhu
 lepas jew bagi rayyan kat ibu die..asal lak ngan ulya kat blakang tu..huhu..
aku menahan keboringan..waa...
 lepas reda..lakew2..haha
rayyan pulak tengop orang laen..haha...aku dah mula borim tahap cipan..duk kat bucu krusi tu..haha
last skali...akher..sumer samer jep..haha..abang pegang blakang akue..and rayyan pulak tengok papa nya..hurm..conoknya pgalaman bergambar...

lepas jer..bergambar..sumer beratur2 ..nak mintak ampun dan maaf...maa..video tu len kali yup..enternet sola lambat ngat!!

jom kita snap picture!!!


umie bersama kak ipar ku..kak shida..wif my rayyan!!
 family bahagea... abang ngah..





abng long..kak long...!!
happy family...


aloololo...ulya tu...!!

comeynya!!!

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

07 September 2011

wait!!


tunggu post blog..
hari raya yep..!!

:)

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!


Works time: prinsip perakaunan..bio 4..chemistry revision..(sikit plak)haha
What’s goig on deq??haha..omwork still bertimbun timbun agie..especially prinsip akaun nie..bender2 yang mesti ditaip..mesti dikemaskini pi gak malas nak wat.asyik terlekat jep ngan aptop nie..bkn kata nak menaip dop..duk tgop cter sampai la pecah skrin tu..lappy pun dah cemuh tgop muka aqu nie..wakaka…chemistry..nanti berkalut2 la wat anti arie sabtu nie haha…pergh!!..
For second last day I’m being here…: hari raya keempat..
Bagai sesuatu yang menyeksa..segala galanya..pembalasan!!..tu yang aq terima ..kerna atie aq teramat kers..bila adeq nak berubah..biler adeq nak jadi anak yam baek??asyik2 jew bad mood..kurang ckap and so on..
Fuuhh!!..ko ingat ko tu baek cgat ker..mmg ah ko tu baek..tak membantah cakap org laen..tapi takkan nak jadi pak sanggup plak??..pergh..~sebaek2 mana pun ko ttp jahat pada mata ko tu..apa kau igt org laen baek cgt..ko taw tak..ko tak penah nak jaga perasaan orang laen walau kau tu pandai jaga pun..wape pratus jep..wat per melayan perasaan yang hati kau selalu keras..da waper banyak ko nak ulang kisah yang sama..terus2 sajew saketkan atie orang..pe kau igt ko tu bgs  sgt ke??..haha..
Uhuk…T..T……….T..T…….T..T
In my own talk: aq mmg jahat..selalu saketkan atie orang yang aq sayam..selalu myusahkan mereka..elalu buat mereka saket atie dengan sifat aq yang ngada2..especially my parents..aq tak sggp tgk mka mereka sehari walau bender yang aq buat tu trlalukecil..kau tau knapa??..sebab aq malu nak ucap pkataan maaf”aku malu”..tapi apa yg aku buat sumertu sementara bagi mereka..tapi bkn bagi aq..walau sekali aq saketkan atie mereka..aku akan ingat sampai aq mati..
Tapi ntah mgapa..aku akue tak penah bersetuju..aku jeles..aku dengki..fuuhh..!!akherny benci aku kembali lagi..terdapat insan yang lain..pergh..!!..syukurlah deq..pe yam tuhan bagi kat kau nie satu kebahagiaan yang takde dlam seseorang..pergh..
To my mum and dad..i love u!! even I not express it..
Peristiwa yg membuat aq x lupe smpai habis keluar aer mata darah..:
Peristiwa 040811..hari khamis..waktu pulang bermalam..
Peristiwa yang membuatkan biolgy aku jadi hamprak…
Dad..juz one words..i love u..and adeq xsgaje..mser tu..aku balik..tpi disebabkan semangat yang bertarung dalam atie sampai aq tak mau pulang slma sebulan..selama sebulan tau.. and on that;s time..ayah dating ambik aq..akue tau aq silap sbb bgitau tiap2 mggu aq balek..tapi..tapi aku tak mau balek..aku tak mau balek sebab mggu tu exam..dalam atie aq meronta2..aq nak balek..tapi??..camner ngan exam??..coz nex exam biology and sejarah..!!..aq menolak tuk balek coz I have my own reason..but before that..umie call..dier nk srh adk blik..sayup2 suara yang palim lama aq rindu..yang buat aq menangis ditengah2 malam..omsick tak tentu arah..then..air mata nie mla bertakung..melawan perasaan utk stay..namun disebabkan aq blaja tuk ttp pendirian..aq ambil kputusan tak balek..
(nasib baek aermata tak tumpah dihadapan ayah)
Sembunyikan ia..membirkan ayah pergi tnpa melihat air mata nie mgalir dihadapannya..pelukan erat ayah yang aq rindukan sesangat…yes!!..i’m really sad..then..tears come out from my eyes..i’m scared to everyone know it..nodded my face towards the ground..back to the dorm…
T..T……T..T..(in deep tears .i could not controlled it all)
Till I sleepy………………………………………………..
I woke up…and cry again..without everyone see it..aq tak kan nyusahkan orang slagi tu kslhan aq sendiri…umie..ayah..maafkan adeq..
My feeling: maybe in this side..i could express it all..my words don’t in straight forward..umie..ayah..n my family..i’m happy to have u all..especilly mum..never being mad coz of me..sebab tu tiap kali umie srh wat per2..adeq senyap jep..sbb adq tau umie harapkan sesuatu yang besar  drpd adq..satu mase nnti..tapi realitinya..adeq tak pnah usha bsggh2 tuk capai bender tu..adeq sayang umie..ade sayang umie.. all I should give out…coz of you..bilerkah agaknya..adeq bley buat umie tersenyum mcm nie??




Ataupun buat umie menitiskan doa2 kegembiraan tiap kali umie doakan bagi kami adik beradik..
Umie taw tak..adeq jelez ngat bila ade kwn adeq sebut2 nama mama diorang..ma…ibu..xspecially my sis dorm..coz of they remember their mum..and what’s about me..??.. sometimes I just want to laugh and scram it..but I just cry..and cry and cry..in front of HIM..in my prayers..coz only HIM KNOW IT ALL..i’m alwez being missing you ..mum..the all days and night..tapi adq tak tau how to express it all..adeq sayang umie!!
Berapa bnyak kesakitan yang adeq tanam dalam hati umie..mgkn adq masih kecil..tapi adeq taw apa yang ada dalam atie umie..sebab umie dan ayah segalanya..bagi adeq mndpatkan CINTANYA…
I don’t have any words lagie..(really despressed..n I could not write it anymore)
Warkah buat umie..ayah…
WASALLAM..
p/s: deep core in my heart, I want to see your future faces became in deep smile that I have seen one time ago…I want it to be reality..insyaALLAH..i’ll struggle for the best of my life..for the damn best..i not give out a promise..but I give out with all my spirits…umie~

:)





I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!



:)

I’m stiching..!!
Song:you <3
you were there to light my day
you were there to guide me through
from my days down and on
i'll never stop thinking of you.

how can i forget all that
when you're the one who make me smile
you'll always be a part of me
how i wish you were still mine.

never will forget the day
how we've met and came this far
we all know we got this feeling
but somehow it has to end up here.

i know it's me who say good bye
and that the hardest thing to do
cause you mean so much to me
and guide the truth from me to you.

for all the things i've done and said
for all the hurt i've caused of you
i hope you will forgive me baby
cause that wasn't what i meant to do.

This song specially dedicate who is special ad really special since today..coZ it means so special since the special delivery of sumethim speciaL..it prove lots of specialist of a person that really means …
I’m Relieved coz I’m make my move away..from days to days..searchng for truiump that hang up there..
I know what’s going on the other side..
But still..i don’t care bout..but still I never remind myself to be satisfied with my own SECRET..
What’s about life mean to you..??..what a world mEans to you??..
The answer for me: coriousity to know everything is the reason I explore all this..this is ridiculous!!..
But I never got  as a jerk one..i means..not all the things in is world really means special since u find all the happiness But not a complement to complete Ur  life..for the truth, I have never make false decision since one day I knoew that the happiness came without I invite it…coz of what??
Because HE give u the best among the best that suit u!!..that’s the point..to remind me to be always grateful with this life..coz of that..i appericiete what I had..those feeling that make me so stronger..so long till I got the triump..and what’s going now..is what u all see now..there’s no a new chapter of life..because it really means a secret since u finish all the sylibes of lIfe..
And now…I really means lots..the happiness..the smile..the whole sadness make me strong..make me strong and feel stronger..coz I’m being matured thinking..i wonder to be a child ..but still a person that appericiete all the feeling…sad..angry..badmood..ad so on..COZ It MAKE ME STRONG ALONE..
InsyaALLAH..
Thanks ..to HIM..
FIRST WORDS “
I’LUCKY COZ I’D FOUND YOU!!...>.<
Thanks 4 everythim…I’m great to knoew you…
And what’s going on between me and you..
Answer: I’m not really hang to you..but I relief that that I really hang onto you..this is not our choice..but days by days..i keep searchin the happiness of life.but still I cannot…since I woke up and have A SMILE..i’m sorry coz I really not care bout somebody but things messed up  and change me lot..i regret that we must not figured what happens to ourself only..but different people wif  description..thanks for the statement..you really means nothim in my life but YOU MEANS SOMETHING that I could not describe it all..what a great person  coz u’re dfferent and that because I LIKE THE WAY YOU ARE..(caring)(problem’s solver)(care free)(kind hearted)…and so on..
And what is the meaning of the NECKLACE..

THERE’S no meaning la…hik3..just want give it to you..!!..take good care of it same that that you care of me..gotcha!!
So..what;s we created that what we are..together searching for THE BLESSING IN OUR RELATIONSHIP and make it the way of our triump..
InsyaALLAH..i’m being alwez pray for our success!!..>.<

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!


For the last ramadhan..
Balik kampong menjadi kebanggaan aq…setelah bertahaun lamanya bertapak di dunia penjara berama scipp..kali nie beh sangat ..

Ahlinya..
Kak mirah
Alya diyana
Farzana..
N me :)

Start from 25 ramadhan..getting home..from one o’clock..waithim for the bus..but continuously..we make the decision to go by taxi..
Straigt to our destination..staraigt to KBMALL..hang out ..shopping..walking..besh gilak!!
It was the hardest point..
I’m back hOme..n the raining heavily..what a coincidence..
Lastly..
SELAMAT HARI RAYA..
MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN..

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

:)
For a new comer ..for him..i think we better straight for our life..straight to be thinking out ourself ..not to make thinGs worse again..the meaning of..it’s a quiet hard for me..it’s not me…
Start from the koir compettion..i knew him..but we don’t speak anything..but for the another time..i found him in NADWAH..i know him …. it all start from that..so I meet him for the second time..what a coincidence!!haha..
Cause the world stop..and since that time..i will remind it all..sorry lots..when I asked ue..u have clash with her..hurms..maybe we halfway there..but nottim even matters..coz my principle..was~
No boys until 20!!
But we still friends..right??..no more promises from me..:)

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!



A special dedication..
25082011..a great wishes..for a person :her:
Happy befday to you ..
Happy befdy to you..
Happy befday to you..
Happy befday to kak mirah..
Happy befday to you..
Lots of love from me..thanks lot coz being alwez be wif me as sis dorm..u give me a smile since I’ve tough pressure..u mean something to me..!!..yes.. a good to share and express something..u are the great..
Just like the way u are..
Wanna dedicate this sOng for ue..

I know it’s not being a long time for ue..and me..
But it would be  along time ..since u’ll not forget me..
You gave lots to cheer me up..but I could not repay it..and I don’t know to repay it all..i know I have been so worse on this time..time to stay for along minutes..could I wish to stand beside ue.
Reaching our destination..until u reach the highest step..in  ur life..
Only>thank you
Cayunk kamoo..!!

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!



:)

iN the middle of ramadhan..i’ been searching for a true person since someday I was been thinking so much time..so many things.waa!!..
For a date..for a new life..
20082011..a date..what??..
I know it was the second post..  a second post… a date…
Me and her..
Just wanna be scream..!imy!!

I LOvE yOU..:)wink..WInK!!!

♫laugh.peace.life♪

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♫bachok♪, ♫kelantan♪, Malaysia